Monday, June 20, 2011
Before I viewed the 30 days abs prescribed by moderation management as a time to take a breather from drinking. A time to clear my head and actually think about something besides drinking all the time. Now I also see it as a time to experience a different life. I see it as a valuable experience that I can look back on and compare to whatever life have chosen. Today that comparison is definitely in favor of a permanent abs. I think in the last week I’ve discovered that even if I moderate successfully, I didn’t go over the limit and I didn’t drink two days in a row, there is still a lingering hint of depression the next day. For me, that more than I want. On the mmlist the other day someone used the term “a delicious melancholy”. I’m not finding anything delicious about the way I feel. Now that I have tasted an enriched way of life, I don’t care for the bland flavor of days like today at all. So I’m back to abs’ing.
So today I out there doing my best to dig my smile out of a snowdrift and figure out a way to add a little spice to my day.
P.S. The picture is the view from my deck this morning, the day before the first day of summer.