Thursday, June 8, 2017



The Future Ballerina/Conductor/Cowgirl

She explained how she's going to be all of these things. When she gets done with ballerina school, she'll go home and take care of her horses and cows, then she'll go conduct the symphony.

Today I salute all mothers of young children, and, thank you for very much, Micro, for the offer of the loan of your children this summer, I think I'll pass. The granddaugher goes home today, however, I'm going with her for another four days to watch 13 y/o grandson (that should be another eye opening experience as he sees how much more he can get away with around grandma than he can his parents) and two rambunctious springer spaniels that they keep inside.

I have to admit my patience is waning and I found myself getting extremely aggravated with her dawdling yesterday on our walk. I have forgotten how children will find a million things to distract them. How they'll stop to pick every flower even the ugly ones, how they can't resist the urge to run up and down every hill a dozen times or to climb up on every large rock, especially when they know you're in a hurry to get somewhere. I don't know why I was in such a hurry to get home. To watch the news? Or get on the computer? Or start dinner?

But when we finally got home, for the first time in a long time, I wanted a drink. I remembered that a drink would soothe my aggravation and give me that boost of flagging enthusiasm I needed. It would transform me back into "fun" grandma for just a little while longer. I've often noticed that many of the women in this recovery world are of a like age as me. Women whose children are gone and who are facing the second half of their life and maybe no longer need that escape and temporary transformation that alcohol provides. I know I've often urged young mothers to do as I say and not as I did when I implore that they give up drinking for their children's sake. I still implore you to do that, but today, I remember, I really do.

I'm ready for a big dose of solitude. I wish I was jumping on a plane all by myself to head to Prince Edward Island, like SkiCrazy. How the heck are you? Where do you wish you were right now?

3 comments:

  1. Oh, I know kids are awesome, but take a LOT of energy and patience!
    When I taught kindergarten, first and second grades, I was exhausted every night, especially as I got older.
    I coped in my later years with coffee, peanut m @ ms, and wine.
    xo
    Wendy

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  2. Those years with young kids are hard.
    Part of this is that we feel obligated to entertain and be overly involved in their every move.
    Lego and play dough just aren't that fun.

    I used booze to fill the boredom. But it took way more than that from all of us.

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  3. Me too. Especially being a mother for the second time. That makes me a mother of dependent children now for 24 years and my two at home are 11 and 12. So I got bored and drank and drank and drank.
    Strangely though - I thought I was more enthused but in relation to kids movies and toys I was less interested because of the selfishness.

    It was horrible. I won't back.

    M xx

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