Kicking and Screaming

Day 7 of abs.


I really didn’t want to get up this morning, but I did. I woke up cranky and stiff from sleeping another on a hotel bed. Then I really didn’t want to take Stanley, the blind killer bichon, out for his morning duties but I figure since I have the privilege of going first thing in the morning and several times during the night it would be unaccountably cruel not to take him out first thing. Especially since he’s prancing around and looking hopefully at me (well, he’s kind of looking towards me since he’s totally blind). So I took him out and it was pouring rain and I’m thinking, I really don’t feel like going to mass this morning so if it’s still raining I won’t. No, mass is not held outside but I was looking for excuses. I dropped the cap’n off at work at 6:20 am and it has stopped raining but I have 40 minutes before mass starts and I decide to get my Walmart run out of the way for the day and I decide if I don’t get done in time for mass, I won’t go. I made it out of Walmart in plenty of time so I went to mass and there was a lesson waiting there for me but I’ll save it for another blog. (I can hear the sighs of relief) After mass I went to McDonalds for my daily breakfast burrito, it was the only thing I didn’t have to talk myself into this morning. As I’m pulling out the drive-through I realize I still need to go for my walk. Ugh! So I turn the steering wheel toward the park. When I get there I can see that the little river that runs through the park has flooded and a good portion of the park is covered in water and from what I can see, the way to the paths I like is blocked. I say to myself, “This is a sign that I shouldn’t walk today.” But I know me and I know that I am, once again, just making excuses. I parked the car and made my way through the wet grass to a clear portion of the walkway and from there I can see a bridge across the river that isn’t under water and I know I can make it to the paths (and the bathrooms which was going to be my next excuse).

I finally start up the paths. I make a turn and I find myself in what I can only describe as a cathedral of trees. The sun is shining through the branches that arch above me but there are leftover raindrops falling from their leaves and the blades of grass bordering the path are glistening. There is steam coming off the trunks of the trees. I swear I just walked into one of those pictures I look for on Google images. Of course, I didn’t have a camera but it didn’t matter because a camera wouldn’t have been able to catch the raindrops falling or the glistening of the grass, it wouldn’t have been able to feel the sun and the damp or hear the birds. It was a living portrait just for me, just for that moment. If I had talked myself out of going on that walk, I would have missed it . And I wouldn’t have even known what I missed.

And that’s why I’m not drinking today.

So today I’m out there doing my best to not miss out.