Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Heading South

I'm actually going to keep this short this morning because the cap'n is pacing, he's been pacing all morning.  Is anybody else married to someone the incrementally shortens the time you have to get ready as time passes?  An hour ago I had an hour and a half to get ready, thirty minutes ago I had an hour to get ready, now I have ten minutes.  Arrgh!!  Anyway since I never know what my interenet capabilities are going to be when I get down there, the provider may have gone out of business, the bandits may have stolen all the copper wire to my electricity, my deposit on my internet may have run out and nobody picked up the notice that the company threw over the gate into the yard (they refuse to use the mailbox for some reason).  I will post as soon as I can.

Here's the cap'n again so I'm going to paste what I said on a message board this morning.

I am leaving for Mexico this morning, I'll be there for the winter, just like I have for the last 4 winters and last night I was sitting in this hotel room thinking, "Where's the celebration? How do I celebrate without drinking?" I have been perm abs for 400+ days and I'm still asking these questions. I hope in a year or two that maybe I'll forget I was ever a drinker. But the fact is, sobriety is life without the "fix" of alcohol. I have to feel sad and bored and angry and nervous and disappointed...and I don't get to temporarily "fix" it with alcohol. But I do get to feel contentment, joy, pride and peace and I no longer got to feel those things, even temporarily, when I was drinking. So it's worth it, but still there are times I think I'm missing something. Of course there are. That's life.
Vaya Con Dios, Mi Amigos!


  1. I hope you have a great time! ~ Christy

  2. "Where's the celebration?" Being in Mexico is the celebration! How cool, I haven't been there but thinking of Mexico makes me think of vibrant life, colour, passion, music, festivals, markets and good food. Omg and sun and warmth! (my grey world is really cold already). It sounds rather exciting. Have a wonderful time :)

  3. Oh my god, my husband does that to me all the time and it drives me crazy! I've taken to asking him the real time I need to be ready by. Cutting my preparation time by 10 minutes also works, ha. I hope you have a wonderful time in Mexico. Looking forward to updates, however often they come.

  4. Celebration.. I'll brainstorm with you; not that I've ever been there. A chance to speak another language; sun , colors, travel, all the stuff Lifespentdrunk said... plus NO INTERNET and no expectation from folks around you to be on the internet is so wonderful!

    I was once in Costa Rica and found that there was a huge lack of advertisements, i.e. billboards and stuff and so my obsession about my body lessened while I was there. Maybe they have a similar phenomenon in Mexico?
    Will you have a support group?
    I have found that I look forward to my meetings and that they are kind of a "fix" for me. Not just a slow, lovely move toward spiritual growth, but like a zap, instant fix. The kind we addicts crave.

    Good luck! Happy Travels!